10> Because everyone is doing it… and you should always avoid doing what the masses do like zombies!
9> Because that Edward guy looks scarily like Edward Scissor Hands.
8> Because it was written for kids… kids people… kids. And that just says way too much about our depth.
7> Because the new movie has werewolves… werewolves people… werewolves. Hey! What did Stephanie Meyer do with my Underworld movie? I let her borrow and I think she STOLE it!
6> Because it’s the 400th time this movie has been made.
5> Because people dress up like the characters and that is a level of fantasy play that I am not ready to devote my life to!
4> Because the first movie was awful… really, let’s be honest – it was terrible. I’m not saying anything about your precious book. But that movie was sub par for UPN.
3> Did I mention that the dude everyone is in love with looks exactly like Edward scissor hands??? That’s funny cuz I don’t remember people being in love with Edward Scissor hands. Interesting!
2> Because they are getting filthy rich off vampires and werewolves… vampires and werewolves people… vampires and werewolves.
1> Because people spend hundreds of dollars on Twilight gear and all they get is the worst T-Shirts I have ever seen. Oh, and it is about vampires… vampires people… vampires.